The Waltones - She Looks Right Through Me (Medium Cool)

Gosh. Can it be true? Another indie record with not a whiff of anorak about it. A compulsive breath of fresh air. Why, you can even hear the chord changes. A total peach. (Your reviewer is too overcome to comment further). (Lesley O'Toole, Record Mirror, November 7, 1987)

Orange Juice - Two Hearts Together (Polydor)

Crisp, catchy, rhythmic - this has all the usual Orange Juice virtues, neither of the vices (Being too cute or too sloppy), and one important extra: a dynamic production by Martin Hayles. Recommended. (Tim De Lisle, Smash Hits, August 5, 1982)

Foster Pilkington - Listening Land (Arista)

A name to watch, and what a ridiculous name it is too (look who's talking - Ed).
Pilkington, real name Zodiac Lovethrust, is obviously a student of The Housemartins' school of songwriting, featuring a natty line in obscure lyrics and presenting an instantly forgettable end product.
As you'll gather, he's hardly my cup of tea, but somebody out there must like him. 1/5 (Dave Ling, No 1, July 26, 1986)

Poor old Foster, the thinking man's Jilted John. His neurotic live shows make your toes curl with embarrassment, and his constant whinging has all the force of a South African reform bill. This heathen music business is not for you, my man. Stamp collecting would be a much more appropriate vocation. (Stuart Bailie, Record Mirror, July 19, 1986)

The Smiths - Panic (Rough Trade)

I'm sorry to say but I find them very depressing. The lead singer's voice sounds like he's in pain - is that Morrissey? It says in the song 'Hang the DJ' - but where would they be without them? If you don't like DJs, you still like them because they play your records and that's what sells records. I don't think they'd like to hang Janice Long or John Peel, would they? I wouldn't play it though - he can't sing and it gives me a headache. In all his interviews he's Mister Nasty too and goes moan moan moan. (Samantha Fox, Smash Hits, July 16, 1986)

Well, bless me, if this isn't the least bit surprising. Neat, concise and somewhat slight, it's neither a let down, nor a leg up from The Queen Is Dead. "Panic" lollops along undemandingly, while Morrissey's rarefied larynx tours provincial Britain, and concludes that the state's in a state, and we should 'Hang the DJ'. Fine sentiments, of course. Lynch the Queen, the headmaster and the DJ, and life will just be one big picnic by the side of Grasmere, Stephen. With all those sliding Marr riffs, and the singalong refrain, this is in fact disturbingly reminiscent of a decent Slade single. But people got bored with them, too. (Roger Morton, Record Mirror, July 26, 1986)

As seen on Eurotube recently, "Panic" is two minutes and 19 seconds of verbal abuse directed at the more faceless of today's popstars.
'Hang the deejay' intones Morrissey, 'because the music that they play says nothing to me about my life'. Which begs the question, does it have to?
All the same, "Panic" is infuriatingly contagious and assuming that at least some DJs remain alive we should be hearing it a lot more over the next few weeks. 3/5 (Dave Ling, No 1, July 26, 1986)

Rogue Male - Belfast (Music For Nations)

Prior to the release of "Belfast", the only remotely interesting thing about heavy metallers Rogue Male was that they share costume designers with the cast of the Time musical.
However, I must confess to a liking of this paean to the city and people of Belfast. It's loud, punky, offensive, and ultimately rather good. 4/5 (Dave Ling, No 1, July 26, 1986)

Fashion - Dreaming (Epic)

Pretty rubbishy really, but a great sleeve, almost surrealist in a way. The girl on the sleeve is obviously dreaming about a fish. It's a bit like the song, unfathomable, but worth buying for a sleeve. (Bobby Bluebell, Record Mirror, April 21, 1984)

I'd like to see what Mulligan could come up with, with Nick Beggs. (Kenneth McCluskey, Record Mirror, April 21, 1984)

I find this song struggling to get off the ground and not quite making it. Very clever production in its own way but slightly dated mixing rock guitars with general-sounding electronics. I quite like the singer but I'm not sure about the whole thing. (Dave Gahan, Smash Hits, April 26, 1984)

Poor old Fashion have been slogging away for years without ever grabbing themselves a real hit. This is one of their stronger efforts, combining all the right ingredients, a name producer (Zeus B. Held) and the right parts of disco soul to power rock.
But it still lacks a real personality of its own. And that's the problem. (Sunie, No 1, April 21, 1984)

King Kurt - Mack The Knife (Stiff)

Predictably oafish version of a sleaze classic, previously sung by Frank Sinatra and everyone who ever wanted to be him.
You know, it embarrasses me sometimes, having to play this sort of stuff at home. The neighbours must think I've got the worst taste in music since Mike Read. (Sunie, No 1, April 21, 1984)

A rather jazzed up version of an old song but it isn't very exciting. They should have tried it at twice the speed. By the way, you get a free flexi disc. (Dave Gahan, Smash Hits, April 26, 1984)

New Order - Thieves Like Us (Factory)

This one's a grower for sure! I've played it a few times and it gets better every spin. Produced by New Order but co-written with Arthur Baker, I personally prefer the band's production. Great melody which sticks in your brain. (Dave Gahan [Depeche Mode], Smash Hits, April 26, 1984)

The phenomenal success of "Blue Monday" is a hard act to follow, New Order have yet to beat the challenge they set themselves. "Confusion" was saved by the brilliant Arthur Baker production but on "Thieves Like Us" New Order get behind the controls and the result is rather lifeless. The song is a grower in a meandering kind of way, but the tuneless vocals of Bernard Albrecht reduce the affair to a flat disco dirge. (Karen Swayne, No 1, April 14, 1984)

I like this a lot. It reminds me a bit of Lou Reed and it's a lot different from their last few singles. I prefer it to their disco stuff which they don't do very well, it's very good and it's still got that indie feel about it. (Bobby Bluebell [The Bluebells], Record Mirror, April 21, 1984)

More melodic than normal New Order. It floats along nicely. (Kenneth McCluskey [The Bluebells], Record Mirror, April 21, 1984)

Billy Idol - To Be A Lover (Chrysalis)

He's back, and the sneering top lip is as curled as ever despite the recent disgusting rumours that he's calmed down. "To Be A Lover" lies down in the green pastures between Elvis Presley and Sigue Sigue Sputnik, which just about says it all, but Billy retains just as much of his own brand of humour to remain aloof from the braying pack. The gospel flavour of the whole package is puzzling, but it's safe to assume that William hasn't found God. Not just yet. 3/5 (Andrew Panos, No 1, September 27, 1986)

Sporting a cheerfully rakish grin instead of that extraordinary twisted sneer, plain Mr Idol has now opted for a much more restrained style. This is an old soul song given a modern rockabilly treatment which mixes electronic rhythm bits with honky-tonk piano, chirpy girl singers and a wonderfully authentic old organ sound, while the cranky guitars of old don't get a look in till near the end and Billy opts for a curious mumbling vocal. Cleverly done, sprightly, but not particularly memorable. (Ian Cranna, Smash Hits, September 10, 1986)

Was (Not Was) - Robot Girl (Mercury)

The first from funk weirdos Was (Not Was) since George immortalised them with his version of "Where Did Your Heart Go". This is typical trade. A funk rhythm most adjacent to Matt Bianco's "Man's Mood" with additional lunacy from all sides. Entertaining track but best wait for the album. 3/5 (Paul Simper, No 1, September 20, 1986)

Single Of The Week or a terrible curse may fall upon your Hipswaying* heads. For freaky dancing and happy Walkmans. B-Side of the week too. "Earth To Doris" will crease never before used laugh lines. (Lesley O'Toole, Record Mirror, September 13, 1986)

Yes, Single Of The Week. What can you say? It's new! It's vital! It's essential listening for hipsters and casuals alike. Everyone should have it. [Referring to the B-Side] Extra good value. (Skin [from Hipsway], Record Mirror, September 13, 1986)

Single of the week in these very pages but a few months ago, and deservedly re-released. The Paris Mix is even freakier, spunkier and more pulsating than the spine-tingling original. Chaotic, frenetic and utterly impossible to dance to unless severely inebriated/Stuart Bailie/in possession of rubber legs. Lyric of the week - 'Robot Girl, do these sunglasses go with my shoes?' - and B-side of the week to boot. "Earth To Doris" is a manic, rambling monologue, and conclusive proof that the brothers Was are geniuses - demented ones at that. (Lesley O'Toole, Record Mirror, January 10, 1987)

Note: The sticker on the 12" was removable. There was an alternative cover with no boobs. * Hipsway were one of Record Mirror's favorite new bands in 1986, and they mentioned them at every opportunity.

Direct Drive - Don't Depend On Me / Time Machine (Oval)

First, I must declare my interest: this is out on Oval, where I work my day shift. But other people in more objective positions...notably the dee jays on the pirate soul stations, and Robbie Vincent on Radio London - have praised the band's deft touch, with some of them liking the catchy "Don't Depend On Me" and the rest preferring the jazzier "Time Machine". Between them, they have helped to give Oval its first disco chart hit. (Charlie Gillett, Smash Hits, February 4, 1982)

ABC - Poison Arrow (Phonogram)

Beautiful arrangement and production, and some clever lines in the song; the singer wavers between Spandau Ballet, Tony Bennett and the Osmonds when they did "Love Me For A Reason". When he figures out the right approach, he will probably have a number one, but not yet, not with this one. (Charlie Gillett, Smash Hits, February 4, 1982)

Toni Basil - Do You Wanna Dance (Virgin)

Brilliant song - Barry Blue, of course. I quite like it, even if the production is a bit obvious to say the least. But I'm sure it'll be a hit. Love to see Barry Blue in action again - the man who ran away from the music business with lots of notes in his pocket. (Roy Hay [Culture Club], Record Mirror, March 17, 1984)

Reckon someone's taking the mickey...Toni Basil may be able to stretch a leg as good as the next dancer, but her 15 minutes are surely up.
Dee C. Lee's making better, brighter cartoons, some nine-year-old's ripping her off on Superstore (quite horrific!) and the song belongs to Barry Blue.
Do you wanna get lost, please! (Paul Simper, No 1, March 17, 1984)

Shall I stick my neck out? Shucks, why not? This, I reckon, will hurtle into the Top Five. Now I know Ms Basil has been responsible for some grisly video activity and that several of her previous records have not been what you might term 'significant' but this revamp of an early '70s Barry Blue stomper is ridiculously catchy. Undo that top button and dance. (Ian Birch, Smash Hits, March 29, 1984)

The Bangles - Following (CBS)

Oooh look, The Bangles have suddenly gone all serious and most effective it is too. "Following" is a sparse folk-like ballad and Michael Steele talks rather than sings the words, accompanied only by an acoustic guitar and some floaty strings. It wafts along very gracefully apart from the spoken parts which get a bit hoity toity here and there, and should see them repeating their recent huge successes all over again. (Ro Newton, Smash Hits, March 25, 1987)

Following Suzanne Vega, girlies? All dour talkovers and serious voices cracking with 'emotion'. Very sixth form angst, girls, and I would've thought that description was pushing the truth a bit. Pass the sick bag.  (Nancy Culp, Record Mirror, April 11, 1987)

Scarlet Party - Eyes Of Ice (Parlophone)

The ability to simultaneously mimic David Bowie and John Lennon in one breath should at least earn them a guest slot on The Mike Yarwood Show but, otherwise, it's not my party. Can I go home now? (Johnny Black, Smash Hits, March 3, 1983)

Kate Garner - Love Me Like A Rocket (Regard)

And we certainly have lift off! The steamiest single of the season, as Haysi's Kate wraps her tongue around some particularly spine-numbing vocals. Haysi Fantayzee are great but this is better, and it will scratch your eyes out. (Robin Smith, Record Mirror, October 29, 1983)

In such a strong week for singles, two-thirds of Haysi Fantayzee have penned and put together possibly the catchiest tune, a production that even Mr Horn would applaud, and dance music to drive you dizzy. Silly and saucy: ketchup to Kate's solo talent for a taste of commercial Fantayzee. Buy the 12-inch for the full effect and blast it like a rocket! (Debbi Voller, No 1, October 29, 1983)

The Cure - The Lovecats (Fiction)

From the opening clatter of sprightly piano, finger-licking bass and a sound that reminds me of clanking milk bottles, this never looks back. Robert Smith and crew are obviously having a good time. Robert sings the daft words with relish while the music leaps and prowls around his voice. Watch this pounce into the Top Five. I'm solid - but solid - gone, man. You will be too. Single Of The Fortnight. (Ian Birch, Smash Hits, October 13, 1983)

I had to check my pulse and reach for the smelling salts after listening to this. I thought the chances of me ever liking a Cure record would be about as likely as Maggie Thatcher doing a spread for Penthouse. But The Cure have left their frowns at home in the cupboard and they've stuck their tails in the air, coming up with one of the most quirky and captivating singles of the year. This is going to make you 'paws' for thought and leave you 'feline' groovy. (Robin Smith, Record Mirror, October 29, 1983)

Get your claws into this one! this is the third of The Cure's 'fantasy' singles and the best yet. A crazy, jangling jazz song with all sorts of strange rhythms and noises inside.
If The Cure are ever going to have a Number One single then this is it. I love these cats! (Paul Bursche, No 1, October 22, 1983)

Affairs Of The Heart - Waterloo Sunset (Heartbeat)

Wonderful looking girl, shame about the record. A synth version of the kinks' hoary old classic and a terrible waste of time. (Robin Smith, Record Mirror, July 23, 1983)

Prefab Sprout - Lions In My Own Garden (Exit Someone) (Kitchenware)

A Newcastle band with a light, airy debut single. Sounds a bit like Aztec Camera. Doubt they'll get far with a name like that, though. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, July 7, 1983)

The Commodores - Janet (Motown)

Releasing "Animal Instinct" as the follow up to "Nightshift" was an utter aberration. "Janet" always was the likely lass from the album, a fine mid-pacer co-written by the stupendous Bobby Caldwell. (Paul Sexton, Record Mirror, August 24, 1985)

Thompson Twins - Don't Mess With Doctor Dream (Arista)

From the forthcoming Here's To Future Days LP and not exactly inspiring. Apart from the Frankie-like "U-u-u-u-ow-ing' at the start this is much like many other Thompson Twins records. Their great problem now is going to be how to outgrow that familiar, distinctive Thompson Twins sound that they pioneered with Into The Gap.
Having said that, the familiar, clean sound is the one that's most often associated with them and perhaps they would be wiser not messing with their dream. (Paul Bursche, No 1, August 24, 1985)

This is a conspiracy...under the guidance of Nile Rodgers, the three headed monster takes a step back towards Quickstep territory with an anti-drugs song set to a heavily rhythmic slab of electronic funk with some obligatory Chic guitar, jungle vocals and some brill screaming. A good hook but a weak tune so not Single Of The Fortnight. Oh pull yourself together, Alannah - stop that weeping! (Ian Cranna, Smash Hits, August 14, 1985)

Commendable anti-heroin sentiments, but as a song rather a plodder compared to the pop craft of all the singles from Into The Gap. (Paul Sexton, Record Mirror, August 24, 1985)

Dead Or Alive - Misty Circles (Epic)

Dead or alive? On the evidence of this, a pretty close thing. Despite the bejewelled conk, Pete Burns could be the next Boy George (very pretty, spaghetti hair-do, lashings of lipstick) if only he'd learn to sing rather than how..ow..owl. Electro disco from a real Diamond Dog. (Mark Steels, Smash Hits, June 9, 1983)

Trivia note: an unsuccessful single in its own right, "Misty Circles" later turned up a couple of years later as the B-Side to the No 1 hit "You Spin Me Round (Like A Record)".

INXS - Don't Change (Mercury)

Synth intro into a truly brilliant early Skids-like guitar thrash and one hell of a bellowed song to back it up. As they say, if Big Country can make it so can INXS. Fact is they're about a hundred times better (and fresher). (John Shearlaw, Record Mirror, June 18, 1983)

Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark - Telegraph (Virgin)

Don't know what to say about this actually, because it made no impression on me whatsoever. Jolly, jangly, deliberately obscure and dull as proverbial dishwater. A bit like "Genetic Engineering", in fact. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, April 14, 1983)

The Caretaker Race - Somewhere On Sea (Roustabout)

Just when you thought Andy Strickland did nothing but sit at the Index desk and pursue Portsmouth FC to the ends of the earth, the dark horse offloads his first vinyl offering since the untimely demise of the fabulous Loft. Strickland is well aware of rm feeling about the group name (no comment), but rm is fortunately unanimous in awarding "Somewhere On Sea" a gold star. Articulate, as one would, of course, expect from a journo), reflective, melodic and everything a good record should be. (There is no truth in the rumour that fivers are being waved under my nose.) (Lesley O'Toole, Record Mirror, November 7, 1987)

Mirrors Over Kiev - Take Me Down (Imaginary)

The sort of thing industry types muse over and pronounce 'a nice little pop single'. Very perky, infectious without being nauseatingly so, well sung, well played and eminently listenable all round. One hundred percent smugness-free. If only The Housemartins made records like this. (Lesley O'Toole, Record Mirror, November 7, 1987)

Madonna - Borderline (Sire)

Not having succumbed to the Madonna charm, this sounds like just another American disco record to me. Still, those admirers of her looks, dancing and maybe even her voice should enjoy this. It's pleasant but forgettable mainly because the sparkle and originality of "Holiday" is nowhere to be seen. (Karen Swayne, No 1, May 26, 1984)

That's 'borderline' as in 'this week's effort is pretty borderline as a song and will be lucky if it borders on the charts'. Will somebody please give this girl real songs instead of excuses? (Ian Cranna, Smash Hits, May 24, 1984)

It was inevitable really, that one day Madonna (like others before her) would run out of suitable mementos to bestow upon her record and paraphernalia buying public. And it seems that the time has come.. . Having released just about every track on the Like A Virgin LP, Madonna has reverted to the standard record company ploy of: 'When in doubt re-release a previous single.' This she has done ("Borderline" first surfaced back in '84), and the song itself remains a pleasurable enough experience - nothing more, nothing less. Now, let's see. . . will the follow-up be "Everybody" ('82) or "Burning Up" ('83)? Any offers? (Anna Martin, No 1, January 18, 1986)

No let up, is there? With the last one beginning to slide down the charts, the Madonna organisation bung out yet another ancient track. Like most of the other songs from her first LP, this has already been a single once. Unlike "Holiday" and "Lucky Star", it hasn't been a hit - probably because it's not terribly wonderful. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, January 15, 1986)

David Sylvian - Red Guitar (Virgin)

The first result of all that beavering away in the studio with musicians from all over the shop that David Sylvian's been up to for the last several months, and one that suggests he's been spending his time well. By all accounts one of the least weird tracks on the forthcoming solo LP, this is quiet, un-Japan-like, almost jazzy and utilizes the talents of trumpeter Jon Hassell to an effect that's both relaxing and uplifting. Can't honestly say that I understand what the song's about, mind, but I do know that it's Single Of The Fortnight. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, May 10, 1984)

The reluctant pop star returns, and Japanophiles won't be disappointed. There's no great change in style, but it's still all a bit self-consciously arty and angst-ridden for my taste. Sylvian's voice is a Bryan Ferry derivative, and tends to drone on in a melancholy fashion without ever really getting anywhere. A hit though, naturally. (Karen Swayne, No 1, May 26, 1984)

Boomtown Rats - Drag Me Down (Mercury)

Overdone, overworked nonsense which shows the Boomtown Rats don't possess an idea between them. (Simon Hills, Record Mirror, May 5, 1984)

H2O - Who'll Stop The Rain (RCA)

I don't think I'd be wrong if I called H2O a formula band. The trouble is, the chemistry that created "Dream To Sleep" has gone awry. Here they're searching around for a different sound.
Endgames and Bourgie Bourgie do this sort of single ten times better.
Back to the lab, boys. (Frank Hopkinson, No 1, May 12, 1984)

Yello - Goldrush (Mercury)

Yello are Swiss and utterly bonkers. They make dance records that you can't dance to, full of lyrics that make absolutely no sense at all. This is probably deliberate. Often they also have lots of wiggy chanting and funny noises, just like this one (helped out, incidentally, by Billy Mackenzie who used to be [in] The Associates). Damn good, actually. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, July 30, 1986)

If any of you read the penpals section of No. 1, you'll probably have noticed that Yello are very popular in Australia. For once I actually agree with the generally awful taste of the Australians. With their breathy vocals, Queen-type harmonies and strange noises all incorporated into a highly danceable rhythm, it's hard to see why Yello aren't massive over here. This could and should be the one. 5/5 (Mark Booker, No 1, August 2, 1986)

Robert Palmer - I Didn't Mean To Turn You On (Island)

Old Bob attempts a cover version of an old song by soul songbird Cherrelle and this is much better than the original.
Bob is having trouble with one of his 'chicks' in this ditty. He just can't get rid of her. 'Hey babe, I didn't mean to turn you on' (what a lad, eh?) he croons over a staccato funk guitar rhythm.
Yes, a funky little number all round and oh, the video to this is exactly the same as the last one. 4/5 (Andrew Panos, No 1, July 19, 1986)

Ah yes, the man who does those sensitive, esoteric videos. Regular Palmer stuff here; clever  clever rhythms, laid-back singing and all that business. You know what I mean, don't you? (Stuart Bailie, Record Mirror, July 19, 1986)

Nick Heyward - You're My World (Warner)

A little chubbier around the cheeks perhaps and a little thinner on top, but pre-Bros heartthrob Nick has lost none of his talent for writing classic songs. "You're My World" steams along breathlessly, crafted with care, precision and heart. (Robin Smith, Record Mirror, August 27, 1988)

Ideal Husbands - Town Planning (Discovery)

Cute name and a nice line in acoustic guitar and piano, ruined by a smug spoken vocal. But then ideal husbands so seldom are, I suppose. (Sunie, Record Mirror, October 23, 1982)

Punching Holes - La Mer (Pinnacle)

A French classic dating from the start of World War 2 and quite possibly the song that started the whole shindig. A great tune, actually, remembered here in all it's Gallic and garlic glory by the beret-wearing, accordion-totin' Holes. Very Nice, if you'll pardon the expression. (Fred Dellar, Smash Hits, October 14, 1982)

Spandau Ballet - Gold (Chrysalis)

In a week when most have forgotten about simple things like melodies, beats, style, feeling and simple entertainment, along come Gary Kemp and the lads to show how it can be done. Remixed but hardly remodelled from the True album, they can start to make room for that gold disc right now. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, August 6, 1983)

Make no mistake this is not a Number One. Bereft of the magic of "True", this works hard to be special and it shows. Consolidating Gary Kemp's chances of soundtracking James Bond films, "Gold" is elaborately classy and eminently tasteful...like the rest of the True LP, which you've probably already got. Still, you could always buy this for the nice David Band poster bag. (Peter Martin, Smash Hits, August 4, 1983)

Has Cubby Broccoli been told about this record? Someone nudge him, quick - Mrs Kemp's boy Gal has written the best Bond film song for donkey's years. It's big, bold and dramatic, with big Tone Basseying away like a good 'un. Smashing. PS - if they've got any sense they'll ditch the ludicrous Roger Moore and cast Steve Norman as 007 in the next one. (Sunie, No 1, August 6, 1983)

Strawberry Switchblade - Trees And Flowers (92 Happy Customers)

This is simply gorgeous. Rose and Jill are Strawberry Switchblade and on this, their debut single, they deliver deliciously sad and reflective vocals over some luxuriantly delicate music. Helped out by the Madness rhythm section, Scottish pal Roddy Frame of Aztec Camera and Nicky Holland, the song is an immediate classic. (Peter Martin, Smash Hits, August 4, 1983)

Considering this has two of Madness, a Fun Boy sideperson, Atzec Camera mentor Roddy Frame and the much lauded Glaswegian duo themselves, this is a mite disappointing. It sounds like a computer designer's dreamy summer single, and turns out wimpier than Clifford T Ward. Anyone ready for the Caraveilles revival? (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, August 6, 1983)

Strawberry Switchblade are two girls who obviously hanker for a return to the summer of '67 - they warble away to a Simon and Garfunkely-type tune with the air of ones who know they were born too late. Even with the aid of a couple of Madness chappies and Aztec Camera's Roddy Frame, the best they can come up with is a weedy, reedy ballad. Decidedly wet. (Karen Swayne, No 1, July 30, 1983)

Rex - A Far Cry (Chrysalis)

It's a bit of a slow burning single with a long fuse, but "A Far Cry" develops into a mellow sultry number, chilling yet warm at the same time. Let it run its fingertips up and down your spine. (Robin Smith, Record Mirror, April 1, 1989)

The Alarm - Sold Me Down The River (IRS)

After years of sometimes scurrilous Alarm bashing, even I've got to admit that "Sold Me Down The River" is a darn fine single, ripe with luscious Celtic guitars and trembling emotions. The flip side features a Welsh version of the song where Mike Peters inflicts some very serious damage to his tongue. (Robin Smith, Record Mirror, April 1, 1989)

Midge Ure - If I Was (Chrysalis)

I've never like the pompous rock approach that Ultravox indulge in for single after single. But surprise, surprise! I do like the simplicity of this, Midge's solo effort.
It's a song that soars along at a steady pace, very reflective and rhythmical.
Bland, but so much easier on the brain. (Debbi Voller, No 1, September 7, 1985)

Take the opening of Queen's "Radio Gaga" and the sound of Midge at his mighty organ and what do you have? Well, a hit obviously. But this is slightly less pretentious than recent Ultravox offerings so let's be grateful for that at least. (Andy Strickland, Record Mirror, September 7, 1985)

In which Midge wonders whether he'd stand more chance with some young lady if he was, well, a whole list of things. I usually find Mr Ure's taste in melodies a little too dramatic, but here it suits the song perfectly. Not bad at all. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, August 28, 1985)

 

Lulu Kiss Me Dead - The Ultimate Solution (Situation Two)

Hmmm. Would you believe Dexys meets New Order meets the Bunnymen? No? I thought not, but it is a fact that the strings on this record do insist on playing one of Peter Hook's most famous bass riffs. It's all a bit messy but at least there's a bit of life in it. Dreadful name though. (Andy Strickland, Record Mirror, July 6, 1985)

Russ Abbot - All Night Holiday (Spirit)

Who can resist the posturings of strutting rock idol Russ Abbot? The cover of this package holiday classic shows Russ drinking stout while such giants of pop as George Michael, Strawberry Switchblade, Elton John and even Mike Read cavort on the beach around him. They should be so lucky! Why, they're not fit to kiss the turf upon which this cerebral God of music and merriment daintily treads! (Tom Hibbert, Smash Hits, July 3, 1985)

Imagine "Atmosphere" with slightly different words and you'll see why a break in a Siberian salt mine isn't such a bad proposition after all. Anyone who buys this deserves to lose their ears in a painful way. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, June 22, 1985)

Russ Abbot knows as much about making good pop music as I do about llama breeding. No doubt this will go down a storm on those dreadful 18 to 30 mud wrestling jaunts which I keep reading about in the papers.
Abysmal piffle. (Max bell, No 1, June 22, 1985)

Kate Bush - Running Up That Hill (EMI)

Hello birds, hello trees, hello sky...
...Ms Bush may have her limitations as a lyricist but for every ounce of tweeness she lavishes on the words she supplies a greater amount of musical light and shade.
"Running Up That Hill" is one of her atmospheric epics, full of tension and controlled emotion.
A Monster hit beyond doubt. (Max Bell, No 1, August 10, 1985)

Now this is how to return in style! Yet more modern experimenting with pounding, percussive rhythms and electronic sounds, but with its melodic strength, intriguing lyrics, (about deals with God) and coolly restrained performance, this sounds not unlike Eurythmics before they went off the boil recently. It's definitely, what's the expression? Look, I'll come back to you on this one...
...provocative? Piquant? Tantalising...
...interesting? Yes, that's it, interesting! And therefore it must also be Single Of The Fortnight! Don't you just love a happy ending? (Ian Cranna, Smash Hits, August 14, 1985)

I may be the most narrow minded person in the world, but I can usually see other people's point of view. In this case I'm afraid I can't. Especially when it's written badly all over her back and shoulders. But the single's nice. (Damon Rochefort, Record Mirror, August 10, 1985)

The Police - King Of Pain (A&M)

Yet another song prised off the Synchronicity LP which is an infuriating mixture of the brilliant and the routine. This is one of the brilliant. Sting strings together chilly pictures of people and animals in pain in a voice that sends icicles up your spine. A Grower. (Ian Birch, Smash Hits, January 5, 1984)

My problem with The Police has been that even though I've liked almost everything they've done - almost! - I've never ever liked it the first or second time I've heard it. The first three times I heard "Every Breath You Take" I couldn't remember what it was called or anything about it. At the moment this just sounds like another good Police single, but just how good I'll only be able to judge in about a month's time. (David Grant, Record Mirror, January 7, 1984)

An eerie little song from the bountiful Synchronicity LP which emphasises the gap between The Police and nearly all their rock/pop contemporaries. Like "Every Breath", this is very simple, very subtle and very classy. Now perhaps Sting and Michael Jackson will get on with some new material. (Paul Simper, No 1, January 7, 1984)

The Winterbabies - Bossa Nova Suicide (Stiff)

A scrupulously clean record, which sets Deborah King's unvarnished voice against Keith Bayley's bleak landscape of rhythmic tension. A Tracey Thorn scraped to the bone, a Carmel for the great outdoors. Clarity, brevity, poignancy - enough said. (Roger Morton, Record Mirror, November 16, 1985)

Big Flame - Tough (Laughing Gun)

Ah,. this is more like it. these boys are also 'indie' types, but the spitting guitar, jerky rhythms and witty lyrics (and record sleeve graphics) show a pop panache not too dissimilar from the Jesus & Mary Chain. "Cleaning out the ears of bored casual teenagers everywhere", it says in their press release. And I can't think of a better record for the job. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, November 16, 1985)

The Big Dish - Prospect Street (Virgin)

Executed in their usual wonderfully melodic style, The Big Dish have once again juggled with the right ingredients - catchy tune, tantalising riffs and highly competent playing - and created yet another tasty sampler. Their fourth single to date (although this has actually been released before) verges on almost perfect pop - powerful, opulent and polished. A worthy release that should hopefully see the Scottish fivepiece receiving their just desserts! (Anna Martin, No 1, November 1, 1986)

The Big Dish are one of those staple meals which are so tedious you need to go heavy on the spices to make it palatable or interesting. However, here you have the blandness in all it's jangly guitar glory. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, November 9, 1985)

Dexy's Midnight Runners - This Is What She's Like (Mercury)

Super. Sexy. Scintillating. Dexys are set to soar up the charts again with their first single for two years.
Yes, after the customary void, the Runners are back with an absolute gem. First came the power and soul of "Geno", then a break, then the Irish tinge of the Too Rye Aye album and "Come On Eileen", another break, and now, a hybrid of the two with Kevin Rowland's distinctive wail over the top. If this doesn't hit number one I'll eat my words. (Mark Booker, No 1, November 9, 1985)

Kevin Rowland's in this pub with this bloke called Bill who keeps saying, "Tell me what she's like" to him, right? "I'm trying, Bill, I'm trying", Kevin replies - trouble is there's this half baked Irish showband with a doddery old fiddle player blaring away in the corner so Kevin can hardly hear himself think. And anyway he's getting quite drunk and so keeps losing himself in the middle of sentences and howling along with the showband but not quite getting the words right or the tune for that matter. Bill never does find out what she's like (whoever "she" might be) and Kevin wakes up next morning with a massive hangover and the awful, dawning realisation that last night he made this simply ludicrous pop disc... (Tom Hibbert, Smash Hits, November 6, 1985)

Prefixed "An Extract From...", this is the single Kevin vowed would never be. But since the massed ranks of the lost soul rebels and intense emotion circle devotees have been conspicuous by their absence in supporting the Don't Stand Me Down LP - here it is. It's deftly edited from the full track and consists of a barrage of barbed poison arrows aimed at easy targets, while attempting to describe the love of his life. It's a curious and stodgy updating of Van Morrison's Caledonian soul vision of over a decade ago, but it has charm. It's the sort of thing you'll adore for five minutes and hate equally soon after. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, November 9, 1985)

The Business Connection - Bring You Down (Hippodrome)

After the national papers' acres of coverage for Lady Teresa Manners and her tiresome antics, you'd expect her record to be something out of the ordinary. But it's not. It's not even bad, just very very ordinary. (Phil McNeill, No 1, February 8, 1986)

The notorious Lady Theresa Manners - daughter of the Duke of Rutland, denizen of the gossip columns and bore of this parish - releases a stodgy synthesizer based debut that would invite jokes about Berk's Peerage if it had any character to get worked up about. Surrounded by such spiffing pedigree chums as Lord Michael Cecil Bunter (surely they call him Bunty?), she proves that though she's thick with aristocracy, her voice is so thin it could conceivably be suffering from anorexia. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, February 1, 1986)

Peter Gabriel - I Have The Touch (Charisma)

Methinks Mr Gabriel has lost his acute sense of drama in his wanderings through ethnic musical styles. His invention and melodic touch, his previous strength, doesn't hold the attention with the ease of yore. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, December 4, 1982)

A sequel to the wonderful "Shock The Monkey" and an even closer look at the absurdities of human behaviour. This time it's all the daft things people do when getting nervous at parties that comes under the microscope, uneasily backed by lots of brittle drum sounds. Have we progressed much since Quest For Fire? Not according to this. (Ian Birch, Smash Hits, January 1983)