Monday, November 28, 2016

The Woodentops - Move Me (Rough Trade)

It's got an attractive earthy sound - there's a lot of back-garden instruments in there. Sounds like Tyrannosaurus Rex. It's good. The singer's called Rolo? Good name. (Roland Orzabal [Tears For Fears], Smash Hits, April 24, 1985)

Sharpe And Numan - Change Your Mind (Polydor)

So here we have it, one of the most unlikely partnerships in pop music: steel-voiced, steel-faced Numan with furry dice Shakatak supremo Sharpe. I don't care much for what either do alone so I expected this to be doubly abominable. Not so. In fact it's rather good. The most amazing thing is that for the first time ever Gary actually sings a tune. Previously he's only ever mumbled in a robotic monotone so understandably the first few lines are a bit painful - but by the end he's really getting the hang of it. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

The most unlikely pairing so far this year features Bill Sharpe, best known for his keyboard playing with snooze specialists Shakatak, and Gary Numan. The combination is bizarre, but curiously effective. Gazza sounds as nasal and distanced as ever but there's more of a tune than on his recent outings. Can't wait to see 'em on TOTP either. Will Gary have talked Bill into trying out his new true blue lipstick? (Karen Swayne, No 1, February 2, 1985)

Shakatak leave wine bar, beam up to Biggles' futuristic bi-plane and tap out somethin' for Gary to get all nasal about. Not the next Chas 'n' Dave. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, February 2, 1985)

Phil Collins - Sussudio (Virgin)

It must have happened like this. Mr Collins, famous for his heart-rending ballads like "Against All Odds", was idly tuning his kid's transistor radio looking for Radio 2 when he caught just a snippet of a trendy electrofunk dance record. "I can do that," he thought. So he did. Only thing was, he'd heard a really bad (not 'baaad' bad, just lousy) example of it - no tune, cluttered arrangement, silly title. Still, all credit to him for copying it so well. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Note: Later interviews confirmed that Prince's "1999" was an inspiration for this one. And that the word 'sussudio' was made up as a generic name with the intention of replacing it later, but it stuck around.

The Damned - Shadow Of Love (MCA)

Back in 1976 The Damned, one of the first punk groups, used to really live up to their name. These days though they've mellowed out and just make jokey, vaguely pleasant pop songs like "Shadow Of Love" which they're promoting with a massive 40-date tour, as advertised on the sleeve. Myself, I'd rather go and see Bruce Springsteen.(Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

Thompson Twins - King For A Day (Arista)

The act of desperate men ... Rumoured to be the strongest track on their latest elpee and, as I've no wish to enter the arena with Alannah and lose my kneecaps, let this odious noise speak for itself. (Nancy Culp, Record Mirror, October 26, 1985)

Eighth Wonder - Stay With Me (CBS)

Don't get me wrong, I'm all in favour of pretty girls flaunting it a bit. Silly boys with more money than sense will always fall for this kind of thing. However, the bottom line is that the much hyped, long-awaited product sounds horrifically like a Compact Records reject. And I'm telling you people, that is so bad as to be unimaginable. Unsubtle, unforgiveable hard-sell of a pair of big blue eyes. Does this girl have no shame? She certainly has no talent. (Nancy Culp, Record Mirror, October 26, 1985)

Here's another lot who've been "hyped" for all the wrong reasons; namely, that their lead singer is a "curvaceous lovely" who once pretended to be a pea pod. The fact that she can't sing for toffee and her group's record is squeaky bubble-gum trash which would drive you completely bonkers if you were forced to listen to it more than once doesn't seem to bother anybody. Such is the way of the world... (Vici MacDonald, Smash Hits, October 9, 1985)


Dire Straits - Brothers In Arms (Phonogram)

No denying Mark Knopfler's dexterity, or his ability to make the occasional classy pop record. "Brothers In Arms" isn't as charming as "Money For Nothing", but it will no doubt be blaring out of the odd Sierra or two this Christmas, as a thousand reps head off to their parents place for the festivities. (Andy Strickland, Record Mirror, October 12, 1985)

Friday, November 25, 2016

Tears For Fears - Change (Phonogram)

I'm not much of a Tears fan myself - all this staring out of windows and ruminating on the state of the world seems pretty futile to me - but this is an undeniably strong follow-up to "Mad World": up-tempo, almost disco directed, and complete with fashionably Eastern-sounding percussion. Not bad. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, January 20, 1983)

Toyah - The Vow (Safari)

Half of this song is actually pretty as Toyah proves that she can really sing on this folksy little ballad. But you just know it's going to build up into a great big epic, and as it does so all pretensions of being nice or even good disappear. Oh Toyah, promises, promises. (Paul Bursche, No 1, November 19, 1983)

Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself (Chrysalis)

Some of us will remember this song as being one of Billy's punk pop band Gen. X's better moments. A surprisingly good song with hummable bits and a nice punky riff. Billy's solo version sticks pretty close to the original, through seems tamer somehow - but perhaps nostalgia is colouring my memory. Shame there's no Billy pic on the cover; his bleached-up good looks always make me smile. (Sunie, No 1, October 15, 1983)

The Stranglers - European Female (Epic)

Lilting melodic stuff given soft but firm propulsion by a foursome who've always shown scant regard for females of any nationality. They've somehow mastered the subtle art of appearing all sweetness and light while somehow remaining distinctly untrustworthy. A hit? I fear not. (Ian Birch, Smash Hits, January 6, 1983)

XTC - Wonderland (Virgin)

The Swindon popsters - now down to a three piece - have lost a lot of ground through Andy Partridge's illness last year but this dreamy track from their forthcoming album might do the trick - if the weather holds up. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, July 16, 1983)

So sloppily romantic and sentimental it's got to be tongue-in-cheek. An electro-ballad which pops rather than fizzles behind a lazy but beautiful melody. Extra award for Sleeve of the Week. (Deborah Steels, Smash Hits, July 21, 1983)

Bob Dylan - Union Sundown (CBS)

Powered by Mark (Dire Straits) Knopfler's guitar this is a bitter attack on American unions and a vast improvement on his recent work. Exciting and controversial, sadly, a rarity these days. (Mark Steels, Smash Hits, November 10, 1983)

Jules - Friends (Tasty)

This sounds like a blueprint for an ITV sit-corn about a divorced couple who live near each other and ". . .cross the road when you see me coming. Don't worry, 'cos I've stopped running." Light, bubbly and very funny offering from a former Wilsation. Could be a surprise hit. (Paul Bursche, No 1, November 19, 1983)

Note: Jules would go on to have a respected musical career under her proper name, Julia Fordham.

Thursday, November 24, 2016

Psychedelic Furs - The Ghost In You (CBS)

"Here Come Cowboys" would have been a better choice for a single, summing up (as it does) popular feeling about Reagan etc, but perhaps it doesn't matter as all the Furs' songs sound virtually identical anyway and seldom like singles. Still, I always was a sucker for Catholic guilt and a good beat. (Ian Cranna, Smash Hits, May 24, 1984)

Bush Telegraph - Turn Those Guns Around (EMI)

Snappy, Afro-flavoured pop marred by an over-polite vocal. Still, in a climate where Holly, Simon and George Michael are top singers, what can you expect? Oh, for a decent set of pipes .. . (Sunie, No 1, November 24, 1984)

Simple Minds - Speed Your Love To Me (Virgin)

You'll be relieved to know that I haven't been bribed by Virgin to review this one well but nevertheless this is a very catchy piece of material from some great friends whose taste in music is not dissimilar from our own. This verges on the modern gothic but they had better be careful because it also sounds surprisingly similar to their last single ["Waterfront"]. It will be a hit but the massive one they deserve will elude them this time. (Martyn Ware [Heaven 17], Smash Hits, January 19, 1984)

One of my favourite bands - another Simple Minds classic. (Steve Strange, Record Mirror, January 21, 1984)

Limahl - The Never Ending Story (EMI)

So twee it hurts! This is really just a cheap, over-dressed fairy story - and one that, as the title suggests, never seems to come to an end. Limahl only sings half of this anyway. The more demanding bits are handled by a mysterious girl. Limahl is a major talent. He once told me so himself. But this is just a joke, surely? (Paul Bursche, No 1, October 6, 1984)

Giorgio Moroder's certainly had a busy summer and seems to be making an onslaught on the charts from every direction, as writer, producer and performer. With a little vocal help from friends, Beth Anderson (vocals), Giorgio and legendary photographer Brian Aris (hi, Brian) who snapped the sleeve picture, it should be another hit for the ex-Kajagoogoo anagram.

China Crisis - Wishful Thinking (Virgin)

Listening to this late on a lazy afternoon, I must confess it sounds quite pleasant. But by the time it reaches Top Of The Pops - and pray God it won't - this new China Crisis single will sound as wet and weedy as 80 per cent of the rest of the charts. Even Elton John's not still trying to write "Your Song". (Paul Simper, No 1, January 7, 1984)

Light and airy pop with a dimple in its cheek. It's quite pleasant but it's already beginning to sound dangerously dated. (Ian Birch, Smash Hits, January 5, 1984)

XTC - This World Over (Virgin)

Mention XTC in mixed company and no doubt you'll be regaled with a chorus of "Making Plans For Nigel", their biggest hit. Five years later, they're still slogging away getting more misses than hits. "This World Over" is a sad, regret-filled postcard of a song from a post-nuclear holocaust world. It's haunting and chilling and might finally end those choruses of 'Nigel'. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, November 10, 1984)

Anti-war holler, wistful and winsome. XTC have stepped back from music industry machinations and are making better records. (Morrissey, Smash Hits, October 24, 1984)

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Blancmange - I Can See It (London)

Hardly an obvious hit for Blancmange, especially after the way that their last single "Lose Your Love" failed to set the world alight. This newie is quite an anonymous offering by comparison. In fact, without knowing who the artist was beforehand you'd be hard pushed to guess correctly - until the Indian noises start creeping in towards the end. That's not to say it's an awful record, just stunningly average. (Dave Ling, No 1, April 26, 1986)

Shakin' Stevens - Because I Love You (Epic)

Remember last year? [Yuletide number one "Merry Christmas Everyone"] Not a whisper from Shaky for twelve months, word gets around there's only 50 shopping days to Christmas, and before you can say 'Elvis died ten years ago' up pops Shaky with a little jiver guaranteed to grace many a Christmas list. Well, apart from the fact that you can't jive to this monotonous ballad and there are no sleigh bells in the background... 1/5 (Mark Booker, No 1, October 25, 1986)

Monday, November 21, 2016

Talking Heads - Road To Nowhere (EMI)

David Byrne and the Little Drummer Boy undergo a head-on collision, with no apparent damage caused to either party. A gospel-style intro flows into a spate of manically rhythmic drumming, strangely reminiscent of that bizarre record by Kissing The Pink, "The Last Film". Sounds wonderful. (Lesley O'Toole, Record Mirror, October 5, 1985)

The Smiths - Shakespeare's Sister (Rough Trade)

I carefully removed the Pat Phoenix cover, placed the shiny platter onto the turntable, and then walked to my chair. By the time I'd reached it, 129 seconds later, the record had finished. "Shakespeare's Sister" finds our lads in boisterous mood wth young Marr jangling on the guitar as if his life depended on it. 'Shakespeare's Sister' was a Virginia Woolf essay on what would have happened if the great Bard had been a Bardess, blah blah, different way of looking at women, etc, etc. Her essay lasted longer than 129 seconds, though. (Paul Bursche, No 1, March 23, 1985)

Ooooh, shut up! Stop moaning. Don't they go on? Morrissey does not sing, he groans. He should have been drowned at birth. Rubbish. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

IF MEAT is murder, "Shakespeare's Sister" is death by strangulation. A bruising, unfocused rush that mistakes energy for Eater live in Stockport cemetery. One wonders if such an ill conceived move would have been considered by a record company less enamoured of their one major act. A dumb record and a poor way to end such a fine singles run. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, March 23, 1985)

Don Henley - Sunset Grill (Geffen)

Another winner from the ex-Eagle's Building The Perfect Beast LP. It hinges on Pino Palladino's fluid bass oozing through the languid beat while atmospheric synthesiser washes coat this classy travelogue of LA's lowlife. A nice one. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, April 20, 1985)

Grace Jones - Slave To The Rhythm (ZTT)

Everyone at "Ver Hits" thinks this ultra smooth 'n' slick jazz-tinged ZTT production number is a work of unparalleled genius. Everyone except me, that is, who thinks it's all gloss and no substance. So there. (Vici MacDonald, Smash Hits, October 9, 1985)

Kept this one under your hat, eh, Trey? T Horn's latest love child sees a long over-due return to vinyl by Grace Jones. The lady is certainly not one to be manipulated; hence those illustrious fingers on the knobs haven't been permitted to twiddle to excess. An understatement perhaps, as it's rather difficult to ascertain exactly what the man with the grotesque glasses has injected. Ms Androgynous does at least sing, as opposed to sneer, for a change but, all things considered, I'd rather shuffle around to one of her earlier masterpieces. (Lesley O'Toole, Record Mirror, October 5, 1985)

The Ice Woman returns with a record that demands obedience. Taking up where "Pull Up To The Bumper" left off, this Trevor Horn produced blockbuster grabs the attention by virtue of its quiet, calculated power. Grace Jones in this mood elevates dance music to pure ritual. Her voice has a tribal quality that drains the listener of resistance while the backbeat moves even the most jaded limbs into irresistible motion. Imagine John Barry meets the Pleasuredome. Imagine a killing song. (Max Bell, No 1, October 12, 1985)

R.E.M. - Wendell Gee (IRS)

I have been known to like the odd country-flavoured band before now, but I'm not quite sure of the wisdom of releasing something quite so down tempo. I fancy it won't convert many barnstormers and I'd hazard a prediction of non-hit. (Nancy Culp, Record Mirror, October 26, 1985)

It's Immaterial - Ed's Funky Diner (Siren)

One of those poor unfortunate Liver bands that seem to have gotten chewed about a bit. Still, a heartwarming and tuneful record that hints towards the type of thing that made the early Teardrops so lovable. Not half badd-o. (Nancy Culp, Record Mirror, October 26, 1985)

Monday, November 7, 2016

Toyah - Soul Passing Through Soul (Portrait)

Q: What do you get when you cross Toyah in her Bowie mood (circa "Heroes") and Sheena Easton's old producer? A: Two things. One is difficulty stifl­ing those yawns, and secondly, something you wouldn't want to tread in while walking across a cow field.(Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, June 22, 1985)

I'm sorry to say it but in the whole history of popular music I can think of no-one who I've liked less than Toyah (except, possibly, The Art Company with their summer hit, "Susanna" last year - but at least they had the decency to fade into obscurity). So I'm not the best person to ask for an objective opinion on her new single, which is a bit similar to David Bowie's "Heroes". For the record though, I don't like it. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

Friday, November 4, 2016

Endgames - Miracle In My Heart (Virgin)

Glasgow synth band who have a host of chartworthy songs on their hands, just dying to grab you with airplay. This one's touching and sensitive, taken from their debut album 'Building Beauty'. And it is - a beauty! (Debbi Voller, No 1, October 29, 1983)
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