The Kane Gang - Gun Law (Kitchenware)

The boys from County Durham have always had a social conscience and "Gun Law" doesn't deviate from the path of righteousness. By comparing the rough and ready justice of the Wild West with today's equally harsh economic conditions, it points the finger at those who grow fat on profits made at the expense of others. And as if believing that the message must be rammed home, "Gun Law" is a dramatic electric slab of Kane funk. It's tightly constructed, sung with great gusto and the spaghetti western-style opening is a neat touch. It won't change much but at least they care. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, March 9, 1985)

An uptempo beat spoilt by tomcat vocals from whatever-his-name-is. You should take a leaf out of your own book and respect the people who have to listen to this piffle. Terrible. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

Nik Kershaw - Wide Boy (MCA)

Perhaps "Wide Boy" is the result of Nik Kershaw realising how absurd it is that a year or so ago no one would even cash his cheques and now there are thousands who'd die for him. So being a responsible sort he takes to task those stars whose heads are turned by fame. "He's no big deal, he's just a wide boy," croons the Ipswich idol backed by the usual sugary melodic pop. I find "Wide Boy" quite forgettable, but I'm glad to see Mr Kershaw has got his feet firmly on the ground. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, March 9, 1985)

Very enjoyable. The lyrics tell a story about Nik Kershaw himself, I think. What he's trying to say is that his critics think he's stupid but, because he's got so much success, it doesn't bother him. One of those records that you may well find yourself humming at the bus stop. Nice one, Nik. Single of the fortnight. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

The Railway Children - Brighter (Factory)

The classiest record of the week by far. From the pulsing bass to the staccato sub-'Blue Monday' drum break, from the gliding guitars to the smooth, sensual vocals, the Railway Children are almost too good to bear. They - or their producer - know the worth of space, pace and timing within a song. You've room to breathe as every bar flows warmly over you. Smoother and more refined than the previous "A Gentle Sound", the potential of this band takes my breath away. Single of the year so far. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, February 21, 1987)

The Go-Betweens - Right Here (Beggars Banquet)

A veritable lemon meringue pie of a record. Light and fluffy, but with a sharp, firm base and solid tune, it borders precariously on the twee side, only just saving itself courtesy of Grant McLennan's nasal passages, his vocals adding a certain sarcastic sneer to the proceedings. The Go-Betweens have never really got above cult status in Britain, and this isn't the one to change that situation, but any song with a lyric like "I know you're 32 but you look 55" deserves a little respect at the very least. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, February 21, 1987)

Marillion - Punch And Judy (EMI)

This group hail from the same part of the country as the Kajas but their music is totally different. They'll be looking for their first hit but, to my ears, I don't think they'll get it with this one. It sounds a little dated to me. They apparently have a large loyal following so, if nothing else, it will please them. (Limahl, Smash Hits, February 16, 1984)

You've got to admire Marillion. Some bands nick chord sequences, others pinch songs. Marillion, they've nicked a whole group - Genesis. Here they rifle through the 1974 back catalogue, filching bits from every song on The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway LP. Six foot nine inch Duranie Fish stumbles about yelling "punch punch punch"as if he was Terry Lawless on a Frank Bruno training session. Undoubtedly the Heavy Medieval record of the week.(Frank Hopkinson, No 1, February 4, 1984)

XTC - Ball And Chain (Virgin)

Now here's a good band . . . but a disappointing follow-up to "Senses Working Overtime". It starts well but doesn't go anywhere much and ends up as the kind of song you admire but don't greatly enjoy. (Tim De Lisle, Smash Hits, March 18, 1982)

The Mighty Lemon Drops - My Biggest Thrill (Blue Guitar)

Easily their most instantly accessible track to date, all bouncing rhythms and catchy melodies plus some scorching guitar, this couldn't be further from Bunnyland. And what's more, there isn't an 'up', 'down', or an 'around' within earshot. This one's all spills, fills, hills and thrills instead. It'll have them humming all the way to the bank, no doubt. (Jane Wilkes, Record Mirror, October 25, 1986)

If, by any chance, you've been wondering what Echo And The Bunnymen have been up to lately, they've actually gone into hospital and been transplanted into something called The Mighty Lemon Drops. The only problem is that The Lemons (The Droppies?) forgot to borrow any of the better songs and are thus left with a fair amount of egg on face. (Barry McIlheney, Smash Hits, November 5, 1986)

Thomas Dolby - Airwaves (EMI)

Runner-up of the week - a strong, atmospheric performance of a catchy ballad with arresting imagery but a curious choice as a single given the odd subject matter. Excellent 'B' side too - a powerful near-instrumental about a plane crash ["The Wreck Of The Fairchild"]. Mark this man down as a star of the future. (Red Starr, Smash Hits, February 11, 1982)

Bonnie Tyler - Here She Comes (CBS)

The new Giorgio Moroder-ised version of Metropolis has attracted some well dodgy geezers and boilers ... and why he wants to go and ruin such a great film by accompanying it with such dross as this - who knows? On the heels of the camp-fire favourite Freddie Mercury with his "Love Kills" opus, comes the Welsh wench of mammoth proportions ploughing her way through another track from the movie. Fritz Lang is currently turning in his grave. (Dylan Jones, Record Mirror, October 20, 1984)

Taken from the soundtrack to Metropolis, this could well be Bonnie's biggest hit since she made No.1 with "Total Eclipse Of The Heart". Slower than "Eclipse", it drifts along aimlessly on waves of melodic synthesisers . Besides helping out with Electric Dreams, Giorgio Moroder wrote this song, produced it and presumably contributed the keyboards. This time next year he should be a rich man. (Dave Ling, No 1, October 27, 1984)

Eurythmics - Who's That Girl? (RCA)

If you'd fed the last two Eurythmics hits into a computer and asked for a follow-up, this is what you'd get. It doesn't stray an inch from the blueprint. It's cold and calculated. In a way, though, that is what we love about so much British pop. When you buy a record by ABC, Wham, Yazoo, Eurythmics, you know that every detail, every nuance has been weighed to perfection. It's the best. "Who's That Girl?" expands Annie Lennox's twin images: the hard, icy lover and, in the video, the challenger of sexual roles. But that's all it is: image. And in the great game of pop manipulation The Eurythmics currently lead the field. (Phil McNeill, No 1, July 2, 1983)

Who's that bloke, is what most folk'll wonder when they clock Annie's latest look. Not that immediate but a strong if gloomy song and a flawless (though slightly dated) production. Already my favourite Eurythmics single. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, July 7, 1983)

Madonna - Who's That Girl (Sire)

Madonna has decided not to put that flouncy flamenco dress back into the wardrobe, because here she floats and trills along to what is little more than "La Isla Bonita" Part Two. Although it doesn't tug at the heartstrings in quite the same delightful fashion as Part One, it is full of soft and incomprehensible Spanish mumblings and electronic calypso twiddles, which will have the Ibizan holiday brigade rushing for the bottles of Ambre Solaire and Vino Collapso as soon as the needle hits the groove. The really bizarre puzzler is that if anyone else had the audacity to release not just one. but two soppy Spanish holiday songs in quick succession, they would be treated to universal scorn. But Madonna is regarded as a Goddess-like being, incapable of mistakes. Which seems terribly unfair really, doesn't it? (Lola Borg, Smash Hits, July 1, 1987)

T: Very much a holiday record. If this wasn't Madonna it wouldn't do anything. I don't think she tries as hard any more.
A: I don't think she needs to, but you're right, it is very monotonous. I quite liked the last one, but I would not buy this.
J: Sounds like her last one remixed. The thing is though, I liked "La Isla Bonita" but I don't think this is exactly going to light any fires. (All About Eve, Record Mirror, July 18, 1987)

Who's that girl? As if we didn't already know. Madonna's fourth single of 1987 is the soundtrack title from her latest film and the sound that will accompany many expectant feet as they hop Wembley and Birmingwards this August. Madonna singles are so effortlessly accomplished these days it's easy to take them for granted. Madonna may also be taking her own talent the same way. This is three parts 'La Isla Bonita', one part Scritti Politti and only one part new inspiration - the exquisite chorus. The Spanish flavour is OK, if a trifle samey, but the breathless pace of the rest is fairly standard. No doubt it will grow on me when it's at Number One the week after next. That's the kind of predictability this girl likes. (Max Bell, No 1, July 18, 1987)

David Bowie - Blue Jean (EMI America)

Used to be that one thing you could never accuse Bowie of being was ordinary. Until "Let's Dance", that is. Suddenly, in a successful bid for mainstream appeal, he chucked away the weird quality that had in the past inspired so many people. The result was a slick but fairly ordinary pop LP. "Dull, dull, dull," our reviewer commented at the time, and for Bowie that was an unpardonable sin. On this, the first track of the batch that'll make up the next LP, he's stuck to the basic "Let's Dance" rock band format, added (but way in the distance) some wiggy percussion and made a single that can only be described, once again, as dull. At least, by his standards. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, September 13, 1984)

With a legend like Bowie it's all too easy to let the past cloud the present. The prowess and magic of his old gems can often lead to an all too critical eye being placed on his every move whereas conversely, it may allow him to get away with murder. Any hopes of an Ali style comeback could be daunted though. Standards are standards and this is as standard - i.e. mediocre - as they come. (Pedro, Record Mirror, September 15, 1984)

When this record was first slapped onto the No.1 stereo a reverential silence descended on the office. "It's a bit plain," somebody ventured when it was finished, and at the time I agreed. However, as with most of Bowie's recent work 'Blue Jean' is more of a grower than an instant favourite. Not one of his all-time greats. But listen twice before you make up your mind. (Dave Ling, No 1, September 15, 1984)

Alison Moyet - That Ole Devil Called Love (CBS)

A smoochy number. One to play while you're with your loved one. I don't think it will be as big a success as its three predecessors but Alison does have a large following, enough to make it into the Top 30. Not one of my favourites, though. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

The lights dim, an expectant hush descends upon a select audience, a piano tinkles, a trumpet softly blows and a voice that's blue and deep starts singing a Billie Holliday classic from the 30s. Alf has taken a break from the usual repertoire of pop-soul for young marrieds to sing something that's a bit more challenging. And she sounds a lot like Cleo Laine. Whether it's a calculated effort to broaden her appeal or a reflection of Alison's avowed love of the blues and jazz, I don't know. It'll be massive, whatever. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, March 9, 1985)

Billy Bragg - Between The Wars (Go! Discs)

A low price EP of four songs showing the man with the large nose at his most potent and lyrical. Billy 'pulls no punches', the thing beginning with "Between The Wars", an anti union-bashing song and ending on a new, slower version of "It Says Here" attacking the Tory press. You could argue that blatant political commentary alienates and ends up preaching only to the converted. Yet subtlety never works either. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, March 16, 1985)

With just his trusty guitar and a swagbag of modern folk songs Spiced with the acid wit of punk, Billy Bragg has confounded all those who've said such antics had no place in 1985. Neil Kinnock's fave pop person (after Trace of course) has now released his first ever 7-inch single. It has four tracks that highlight Billy's mastery of investing simple songs with a sense of defiance and humanity. At £1.25, you can't go wrong. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, March 9, 1985)

Oh dear, I hate this man and his music. I've heard this on Whistle Test and hated it – my opinion hasn't changed. It's got the same monotonous tune all the way through and he can't sing to save his life. Why don't you just leave the music business, Billy? (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

JoBoxers - Is This Really The First Time? (RCA)

Remember that Boxer Beat? You could be forgiven for nearly forgetting it; Dig and the gang have been off the block so long they were in danger of being not last year's thing but the year before that's. Luckily for them no one else stepped into their shoes. The Boxers were one of our better modern R&B groups and this comeback has all the customised hard jiving kick that makes them so compelling. Instantly, naturally wonderful. (Max Bell, No 1, March 30, 1985)

The JoBoxers, who brought you "Boxerbeat" and all the rest of them, have bounced back with a new image - Edwardian-style. It suits them and the record is equally impressive, if just a little repetitious. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

Wham! - Freedom (Epic)

Ever since I gave "Wake Me Up Before You Go Go" a less than rave review, Wham! have apparently been saying that I was "out to get them". Not true. As their past releases (and, indeed, "Careless Whisper") show, Wham! have a tremendous spark of talent. I just don't think they're using it very well. With records like this weedy, uninspiring Motown-derived effort, I reckon they're aiming far too low. Take some risks, boys. You can afford to. Still, although this sounds like The Truth on a wet afternoon, it will undoubtedly be a hit. Such is life. (Dave Rimmer, Smash Hits, September 13, 1984)

"I don't want your freedom/I don't want to play round/I don't want nobody babe/Part-time love just brings me down." The bad boys have changed their tune in more ways than one. Now it's the girl who wants the freedom to fool around, and George isn't too keen on the idea. Like 'Wake Me Up', 'Freedom' is unashamedly lightweight and catchy. It bounces and swings along in masterly fashion and after two hearings you'll be singing it in the street. OK, so it may not be the toughest, most essential dance record of the week, but it's a cleverly crafted pop song which blends Motown with The Four Seasons and a touch of Bay City Rollers (ask your mum) .. . (Karen Swayne, No 1, September 22, 1984)

Tears For Fears - Everybody Wants To Rule The World (Phonogram)

An excellent follow-up to "Shout". A very twee introduction but I think high-pitched vocals suit Curt Smith immensely. I hope it gives them a Number One. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

TFF's so called harder sound (not before time) has been overstated. I'm no fan but I can hear the makings of a passable pop group in this mild tune. Highly hummable, well arranged and not at all megalomaniac. 'Everybody' even features a rockist guitar fade out from Roland which would have been cause for cries of "hang the scoundrel" two years back. Times change. A certain top five hit. (Max Bell, No 1, March 30, 1985)

Wham! - I'm Your Man (Epic)

I must say, I do like the cut of George Michael's jib. What usually happens once you've become the world's most famous rising pop star is you get complacent and start making useless records, or you go dotty and stop making records altogether. Not George. George cares about pop for too much to let himself become distracted just yet. He's passionate about pop and he's good at it too: not a great songwriter but a stylish "craftsman" and a marvellous singer. On "I'm Your Man" he comes on all breathy and slippery in a racy pumping romp that's a little bit Motown and quite a lot George McCrae. A dignified hit: G. Michael is a proper star. (Not entirely sure what Andrew does on this but, no doubt, he does it very well too). (Tom Hibbert, Smash Hits, November 6, 1986)

I don't own a crystal ball anymore but I suppose "I'm Your Man" will get to Number One. However, the first Wham! single this year doesn't have the snap, crackle and pop of "Go-Go" or the sheer cheek of "Freedom"'s Motown rip-off. To these ears it's a rather pale re-write of "Freedom" with a weedy sax. Perhaps George is working too hard. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, November 16, 1985)

Culture Club - The War Song (Virgin)

George has come to the profound conclusion that both war and people are stupid, and since he delivers the message in just about every language except Lithuanian and Swahili, he obviously feels it's important. Still, trite lyrics aside, the song's so infernally catchy that I've been whistling it all weekend (although I can't quite manage the "Aaieewuuurigh!!!' in the middle yet), and it's got to be Single Of The Fortnight. Whether I'll feel quite the same when everyone from the neighbour's budgie to the weird bloke downstairs is whistling it too's another matter, of course. Oh well, I can't wait to see the video. (Vici MacDonald, Smash Hits, September 27, 1984)

There's been so much intellectualising about war – obscure allegories, murky metaphor – plenty of space left for clever clogs to say "War is alright if .. " So George lays it on the line, from his position a mass medium, mass appeal group: "War is stupid and people are stupid and love means nothing in some strange quarters." Embraced by a tune that sweetens the message without weakening it, this is the ultimate Culture Club song. We need all cultures in that club learning to say 'No'. Single of the week. (Martin Townsend, No 1, September 29, 1984)

"War is stupid", George reveals. Lyrics of true insight there. And a tune that succinctly combines all their previous singles, and a poster with the 12-inch, and an even happier bank manager. (Paul Sexton, Record Mirror, September 29, 1984)

Thompson Twins - Sister Of Mercy (Arista)

Odious Airfix popsters return with their usual reworking of past commercial glories. All wrapped up in the usual big production job which fills any gaps. What an awful group they are. This will be a huge hit, You'll write to complain about me and none of us will be any the wiser. (Andy Strickland, Record Mirror, June 30, 1984)

Marshall Crenshaw - Whenever You're On My Mind (Warner Bros)

Despite a residency on the Old Grey Whistle Test and the solid backing of the rock press, Marshall just can't arrest the attention of the Great British Public. This is typically tuneful, punchy guitar rock: good intentions, bad sales. (Phil McNeill, No 1, July 2, 1983)

It's A Mystery: While the merits of the video seem to be up for debate, the actress playing the English love interest was clearly a hit with viewers. Shame that nobody seems to know who she was.

The Boomtown Rats - A Hold Of Me (Mercury)

Muddy, mouldy progression of tired ideas hung, drawn and quartered by Bob's tenth-rate Jagger. The Rats always dealt in back cliches, but at their best - "Rat Trap", "Mondays" - they managed to find a song from somewhere. They don't here, and only Geldof's new found celebrity status can do anything to save this. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, February 2, 1985)

Poor old Bob Geldof. He does a brilliant job as the main force behind Band Aid, sacrificing months of his professional and private life and all some people can say is that he's doing it to resuscitate his own career. And it's just not true. Mind you, if it was, it wouldn't make any difference - this new Boomtown Rats single is too unspeakably ordinary to be saved by any amount of publicity. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Kim Wilde - The Second Time (MCA)

The good news to emerge from Kim's long absence is that she's now writing her own songs. The bad news is that 'The Second Time' is not one of them. Penned once again by Dad Marty and brother Rick it's a fusion of fashionably 'hard' sounds. But it lacks the fluency of good dance music and the killer punch of Frankie-pop. Check out her own 'Fit In' on the new LP to find – at last – the real Kim Wilde. (Martin Townsend, No 1, September 29, 1984)

Ricky and Marty Wilde (her brother and Dad) always manage to build a classic little pop song around Kim's vulnerable falsetto, yet for some reason she doesn't do as well in the charts as she used to. I've got most of her singles, but it's a sad fact that they were all found in bargain bins. (Vici MacDonald, Smash Hits, September 27, 1984)

The title fits as Kim tries again with MCA and starts by nicking the chorus from "Let's Dance". Still, long as she does something risque in the video it'll be a hit - that's the way it works, I believe. (Paul Sexton, Record Mirror, September 29, 1984)

Virginia Astley - Melt The Snow (Rough Trade)

For the past few years, Virginia Astley has been quietly producing enchanting music. Using piano, flute, and her wistful, choirboy voice, she creates an atmosphere of stillness in her songs, which are often moving and always tender. "Melt The Snow" is the latest of these, and one of her best yet. A gentle and optimistic song, it kisses away those winter blues. Single of the week. (Stuart Husband, No 1, March 2, 1985)

Virginia Astley is like Kate Bush reincarnated as Sebastian Flyte: at times the tinny choral tones are stretched as thinly as a sliver of smoked salmon at a vicar's tea party, but they're more than compensated for by those quaint old stringed instruments. Julian Cope, eat your heart out. (Dylan Jones, Record Mirror, February 23, 1985)

The Style Council - Shout To The Top (Polydor)

The self-conscious searching for a sound that used to characterise the Style Council, has all but disappeared. "Shout To The Top" has Mick Talbot trading piano riffs with an orchestral backing that forms the song instead of just decorating it. And Paul Weller sounds comfortable copying no vocal style but his own. I think they just earned themselves a new fan. How does 'Cupofteano Kid' sound: (Dreadful – Ed.). (Martin Townsend, No 1, September 29, 1984)

Once more Mr Weller plunders the past to give us yet another passable imitation of those baggy-trousered soul stompers of yore. Personally, I've never been able to understand why he spends so much time and energy attempting to emulate something that's already been done - and far better - before. Must be all that capuccino. (Vici MacDonald, Smash Hits, September 27, 1984)

Playing spot-the-influence one more time - adaptations of the hard-hitting chords from "Backstabbers" and "War", a glance back to "My Ever Changing Moods", and still it sounds the freshest pop record of the week. (Paul Sexton, Record Mirror, September 29, 1984)

UB4O - Don't Break My Heart (DEP International)

"I Got You Babe" may end up being something they'll never be allowed to forget (perhaps they don't want to forget!) but this beautiful song goes some way to restoring my respect. An irresistible rhythm section supports the band's most textured and atmospheric ballad to date. Love it. (Paul King, Smash Hits, October 23, 1985)

British reggae's pride and joy, UB40 return to the throes of the national charts, this time without the vocal aid of Chrissie Hynde, but with a remixed track from their 'Baggariddim' dub album. This is satisfaction on a more mellow scale. Throbbing bass and richly wondrous entities are entwined around a simple plea from Ali Campbell. Ambitious? Not really; but ardently superior. A hit? Absolutely. (Anna Martin, No 1, October 26, 1985)

The Jesus And Mary Chain - Never Understand (Blanco Y Negro)

If my name was Gallup this one would shoot through the Top 40 like a laser gun through lard. Over a sublime racket of whistling guitars bobs a breezy melody curiously reminiscent of The Beach Boys. Its simplicity and individuality amid countless, cowardly records in the review pile striving to sound like each other is nothing short of exhilarating. Good vibrations. Single Of The Fortnight. (Andy Kershaw, Smash Hits, February 28, 1985)

The Jesus & Mary Chain re-invent the Ramones via the Beach Boys, a buzzsaw factory and several low-flying aircraft. It's a strangely compulsive record, but though it is hardly a classic - this is being championed by sections of the music press as the punk revival landmark of the century. Magic messiahs? Me thinks not. (Dylan Jones, Record Mirror, February 23, 1985)

King - Won't You Hold My Hand Now (CBS)

An obvious follow-up this. I reviewed 'Hold My Hand' first time round and although it's been fiddled with a bit it still sounds the best King single yet let out of The Tower. More raunchy than "Love And Pride", the boys use both their boots and guitars to kick ass. Of course I knew they were going to make it all along... (Paul Simper, No 1, March 16, 1985)

Though they've yet to produce a classic 45, the boys from Coventry have certainly tried their hand at just about every musical style in the book. "Love & Pride" was a ska-based Gary Glitter/Jobriath gallop, "Soul On My Boots" was Culture Club on amphetamine ... and this here disc is like a mutant Shadows gone haywire. However thin and lifeless King may appear, you can't get the damn tunes out of your head. (Dylan Jones, Record Mirror, October 20, 1984)

Ah ha - a hot property! King have finally got the success they believed themselves worthy of and Paul's become a sex symbol. Swoon! As for this, it's more forceful than "Love And Pride" - stronger where that seemed to have great gaps in the mix, more controlled, less boppy and very very professional. Re-mixed to squeaky clean perfection. I'm going to stick my neck out here... I think it might be a hit. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, March 16, 1985)

It's catchy but I think the instruments drown his voice too much. Probably a hit but not as big as "Love And Pride". I do like this group and the song is good but the chorus is very boring. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

Simply Red - Jericho (WEA)

One of those frustrating songs with a brilliant intro and verse - blues and jazz combining perfectly with Mick Hucknall's soulful voice and then ruined by a ridiculously out of place chorus which sounds like a stupid football chant. A shame, but still a good single. (Simon Braithwaite, Smash Hits, February 12, 1986)

Strawberry Switchblade - Let Her Go (WEA)

Another single from this sugary twosome. Confused vocals with much the same backing as the rather-better "Since Yesterday". Give it another go, girls. (Marshall O'Leary, Smash Hits, March 14, 1985)

Sounds like one of those groovy records they used to make in the Swinging 60s - a touch of psychedelia, some tight harmonies and a 'neat' melody. If you have to live in the past I guess the 60s are as good a time as any. And with the might of Warners behind them no doubt the Strawberries will have everyone smothering themselves in apple blossom and chewing strange substances long before summer. (Paul Simper, No 1, March 16, 1985)

Despite all the slaggings, "Since Yesterday" had a certain lilting charm. This does not, ending up as a disposable dose of fairground sweetness. Strawberry Switchblade are neither stupid nor puppets but their success lies in their ability to fill a gap in the market. Nice girls with nice tunes who boys can harbour crushes on and girls emulate. Watch out for the Strawberry Switchblade dolls you can dress yourself. In the shops any day now! (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, March 16, 1985)

The Farmer's Boys - Phew Wow! (EMI)

Any song that contains the immortal lines 'Don't worry, stop thinking. Let's go and do some drinking' is worthy of the highest praise. When that same song is bristling with pop harmonies, dead '60s guitar and a lyric that observes a bunch of lads talking down a pal who's been ditched it's doubly rare. Obviously a hit. But why don't The Farmers Boys sisters get themselves a group called the Norfolk Broads? (Max Bell, No 1, October 20, 1984)

Howard Jones - Things Can Only Get Better (WEA)

Years from now, when the '80s are but a memory, I will still detest Howard's "New Song" as much as the day I first heard it, and squirm every time anyone mentions 'mental chains'. But ever since that rather ropey opener, he's been making increasingly likeable pop songs. This is no exception. The bubbling uptempo arrangement (especially good on the 12") masks a rather slight main tune, but the real killer bit is the chant. For the next two months the milkman, the hairdresser, the window cleaner and just about everyone else important in your life will be driving you barmy with their out-of-tune renditions of "woah-oh woah-oh-oh woah-oh, woah-oh, woah-oh-oh, woah-oh". A massive hit. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Song construction kit: take two Squezy bottles, some sticky back paper, an outtake from Finland's entry in last year's Eurovision Song Contest and a smidgeon of garden fence philosophy. Then, get in some real fine musicians, beef it up a bit and smile. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, February 2, 1985)

Never having succumbed to the Howie `I'm just an ordinary guy with a daft haircut' charm, this one totally passes me by. He sounds as optimistic as ever (how can anyone be that chirpy?), but has dropped the synth dependence for bass and brass and a chorus of "woh woh woah woah woh" which gets more than a touch irritating. 'Things. . .' bounces along merrily enough but there's nothing to convince me that I'd like to get to know him well. (Karen Swayne, No 1, February 2, 1985)

The Style Council - Come To Milton Keynes (Polydor)

An offbeat and disappointing effort from Mick'n' Paul, a reliable pair whose singles have consistently satisfied even if their albums haven't. With tongues firmly in cheeks they tell the tale of a couple 'moving to a new town' in search of work but finding a situation equally as desperate as before. 'I may slash my wrists tonight,' sings Weller in the middle. I'll join you if I have to listen to this rubbish again. (Dave Ling, No 1, June 29, 1985)

Waft along with Mick and Paul as they cycle off into those beautiful sunsets that exist only in some advertising executive's mind. Drink in that light, happy beat, that sweet irony on the Weller breath, that sharp, strong production. One of the most immediately accessible tracks on the Our Favourite Shop LP and another top 10 hit for the Councillors. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, July 29, 1985)

Billy Idol - Sweet Sixteen (Chrysalis)

Bit too mild for me. My kind of mellow's a bit more romantic than Billy Idol. I like reggae or slow soul for relaxing to. I wouldn't buy this type of record though I expect lots of young girls will. I don't think he really knows what he's doing here. He used to be a rocker, didn't he? I wish him well, but it's just not my cuppa tea. (Neidet Salih, No 1, June 20, 1987)

What a sad tale this song tells. Sir Billiam is so bonkers about his 16 year old girlie that he builds a room for her to keep a rocking chair in (i.e. he envisages the relationship lasting quite some time), only to find that the ungrateful little vixen has scarpered with someone else. It's very weepsome, with a lolloping rhythm and a complete absence of the usual Idol rawk'n'roll screech-guitar; in fact, you can easily imagine a knicker-garlanded Tom Jones grimacing his way through a tortured version of "Sweet Sixteen" in cabaret. Could Billy Idol be the Tom Jones of the 21st century? It's not bloody impossible, as the great Welshman himself might say...  (Vici MacDonald, Smash Hits, June 3, 1987)

Prefab Sprout - Faron Young (Kitchenware)

The Sprouts finally deliver a single worthy of their adulatory press. Sprightly and catchy, Paddy McAloon's pleasantly sincere vocals make you ignore just how pretty darned weird are the words he's singing. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, July 29, 1985)

The Sprouts' attention to detail is what raises them above the dross. Quite what Paddy McAloon has in mind when he chants 'you give me Faron Young, four in the morning' is open to the individual's interpretation, but somehow it doesn't seem to matter. The musical arrangement is pleasant and the bit at the end which sounds like toads singing round a campfire is a stroke of genius. (Dave Ling, No 1, June 29, 1985)

Having previously dismissed P. Sprout as flitty and too clever by half, I now find myself forced to eat my words. This is an English truck-drivin' song about having to eat Yorkie Bars in the horrific surroundings of motorway "service areas" and listening to the ghastly weepies of country crooner Faron Young on a crackling in-cab radio. At least, I think that's what it's about. Anyway, the lot of the lorry driver is not a happy one and "Faron Young" (the song not the singer), with its deft quotes from C&W banjo-pickin' and steel guitar music, is witty, charming and quite excellent. (But I still say this group has a stupid name.) (Tom Hibbert, Smash Hits, July 3, 1985)

The Armoury Show - Glory Of Love (Parlophone)

Richard Jobson has certainly progressed since his days with the Skids. You can understand at least half he's singing on this record, although he does deliver a good few heathen chants for old times, so you still feel you're among friends. Not as good as it should be, but they're getting there. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, June 29, 1985)

The Armoury Show are a powerful team (Richard Jobson and John McGeogh) so heaven only knows why this band aren't having massive hits. Their first two singles had enough fury and passion for the whole top hundred but obviously they're falling on deaf ears. Having said that though, the recorded "Glory Of Love" doesn't quite match up to their live version -a case of the wrong producer for the right song. (Debbi Voller, No 1, July 6, 1985)

Pet Shop Boys - West End Girls (Parlophone)

The Pet Shop Boys (alias Mutt and Tibbs, no doubt) released "West End Girls" some time ago, but claim that second time around it's re-recorded. Which could be another way of saying that they've only got one good song and this is it and please will you buy it. Well if it worked for King with "Love and Pride", it should work for "West End Girls" which, with its sad, reflective air set to subdued sub-disco, is miles better. (Adrian Tierney-Jones, No 1, November 16, 1985)

For some reason, this sprightly amble through the studied lowlife of a city triggers off the fragrance of William DeVaughn's "Be Thankful For What You Got" and something else that'll come to me when I least need it. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, November 9, 1985)

A tumble through Soho in the seedy wee, wee hours accompanied by the kind of jaundiced horns that are more often found on soundtracks of films about Hollywood actresses hitting the bottle and cracking up with mascara running down their faces (Valley Of The Dolls springs to mind). Set against this, the electronic bleats and the demi-rap (Grandmaster Flash And The Furious Five's "The Message" without the baseball bat) create an atmosphere of danceteria sleaze that's almost sinister. Brrr. (Tom Hibbert, Smash Hits, November 6, 1985)

Amazulu - Excitable (Island)

Amazulu have a brilliant and colourful image but so far that image has been more memorable than their music. Well hopefully that'll all change now with this energetic toe tapper of a summer single. The strength of this bouncy tropical pop song actually lies in the fact that it's so deliciously simple and repetitive. (Debbi Voller, No 1, July 6, 1985)

I must be going mad, because I was sure there were six members of Amazulu. And on this super-shiny pop reggae it sure sounds like more than one woman making all those noises. Must have been mistaken, because if there were six of them, they wouldn't show the prettiest member - the most "marketable" one - on the cover and publicity shots now, would they? No, of course not. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, July 29, 1985)

Could these reggae gals be the new Bananarama? No. Even the "rams" never came this close to sounding like a Coco Pops commerical. (Tom Hibbert, Smash Hits, July 3, 1985)

The Ramones - Bonzo Goes To Bitburg (Beggars Banquet)

Ah, they don't make records like this anymore - unless, of course, "they" are The Ramones who continue to thrash away in their leaky jeans and unhygienic sneakers as if it were still 1976. Perhaps no one bothered to tell them the news that "punk's dead" - and thank goodness for that, because this topical assault on R. Reagan's recent German blunderings reminds one that a song that sounds like it was recorded by road drills in a tub of yoghurt can still be genuinely exciting. I love this for its "blistering-chainsaw" qualities, its dumb attempts at "na-na-na" harmonies, and, most of all, for Joey Ramone's voice which sounds more like a nasty accident in a hamburger factory than ever. Joint Single Of The Fortnight. (Tom Hibbert, Smash Hits, July 3, 1985)

The lovable pin-heads return with some more typical Ramones thrash. Untouched completely by anything that has happened in the world for the past 10 years, the Ramones go their own sweet way re-recording the same song time after time but still sounding fresh and happy. Old friends, dear friends, what a sad and trivial place the world would be without them. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, June 29, 1985)

The Fall - Couldn't Get Ahead (Beggars Banquet)

Psychobilly was a name coined to describe wild and wonderful horror folk the Cramps. This latest from the dear old Fall could fit such a description equally well, although the Manchester band owe far more to the living than the dead. The whole thing bops along jerkily but with a total joy and life that's brilliantly infectious. Wild. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, June 29, 1985)

Mark E. Smith is without doubt the man with the most revolting voice in modern day music. A tuneless dirge with puerile lyrics presumably written on his tube ticket to the studio, "Couldn't Get Ahead" is an utter embarrassment from start to finish. I've always placed pride before a Fall, maybe it's time Mr Smith started doing the same. (Dave Ling, No 1, June 29, 1985)

The Big Dish - Big New Beginning (Virgin)

The A&R departments of the major record labels must have been keeping the London to Glasgow shuttle going singlehandedly in recent times. To get a record deal you've got to have a Mc in front of your name and a guitar over your shoulder. And joining the Hipsways, the Sugar Sugars, the Chewy Racoons and 10,000 others, we now have the Big Dish. And no doubt about it - they're the best of the bunch. "Big New Beginning" is a beautifully catchy tune with melody, smooth guitars and a lazy, soulful voice to warm you right through. The best debut from a band since "Hand In Glove". Excellent. Single Of The Week. (Eleanor Levy, Record Mirror, June 29, 1985)

Guitars, tambourines and harmonies - these old ingredients are creeping back into many a new song and Glasgow band The Big Dish have adopted this delicate style with honours. Sorta Beatles meets The Lotus Eaters - this debut single glows with melody and optimism. An excellent beginning to the Dish's career. (Debbi Voller, No 1, July 6, 1985)

Debbie Harry - French Kissing (Chrysalis)

The Face, The Voice, The Bleach, The Beat - they're bock and there's no one to touch her. Forget your Madonnas and Patsys - Debbie H is the one and only pop Blondie. This return to greatness is as simple and smooth as the slinky disco it accompanies. A Goddess is re-born. 5/5 (Paul Simper, No 1, November 8, 1986)

She's back! Back, BACK! (You're getting the hang of this nicely - "Reviews" Ed.) And back in spiffing form too with this addictive little shuffle between France and America, sort of Paris, Texas set in a late-night disco groove. Why, I was just saying the other day, "What the world needs now is the return of Debbie Harry", and lo and behold here she is, sounding just as brill as she did 250 years ago with Blondie. Listen with eyes firmly closed and tongue in cheek for best effect. Naughty but v.v. nice. Single Of The Fortnight. (Barry McIlheney, Smash Hits, November 5, 1986)